Prisoners

My name is Boon. I’m 45 years old and from Sitiawan. Eight months ago, I was released from prison. I was sent there due to drug abuse. To be honest I had entered prison more than 10 times for the same reason. I also wondered why I couldn’t change, I had tried to kill myself many times but failed to do so.

When I was younger, my family and I lived in a remote area in Setiawan. I was frequently beaten up by my dad. He used to drink a lot and whenever he came back home he would look for me and beat me, but my mom would come to rescue me. My mom was the only one who protected me.

At the age of 10, I began to look for friends outside to rely on from outside because my home was not a safe place and I lived in fear with my father. Soon, I met some elderly men and they introduced me to drugs. I started taking them as they made me feel happy and I became addicted to that feeling everyday. My family soon realized something was wrong with through my behaviour and found out I was addicted to drugs.

During those years I was addicted to designer drugs which affected my physical and mental health, my education and my right to live with my family. I was told to leave my home by my family when I was 15 because of my addiction. From Setiawan I moved to Kuala Lumpur, Johor and then Penang. Everywhere I went I could not stop looking for drugs. I tried to work but when my addiction came back I would go and buy drugs. The addiction made me lose my job as I was not doing well at work.

I arrived in Penang at the age of 22, I thought I could start a new life here. I found a good job but after not more than 2 months in the job, the addiction came back to haunt me. I spent all my hard earned money on drugs and was caught by the police for drug abuse. My life as a prisoner began from the age of 22. Every time I was released, I didn’t know where else I can go so I would visit the group of wrong friends and I would get arrested again.

After 23 years of going in and out of prison, I started to question myself “what is life?”. In the prison, I met a man from the Catholic Church Prison Ministry, he was there to preach the gospel to us. He has always supported me and gave me counsel when I was down. Now, I have been more than 8 months drug-free. I feel like I have gained back my life. I am very grateful that I attended his gospel sharing session in the prison and he offered to help me after my release. He found me a job and a place to stay. Together with other ex-inmates we work in a car wash.

But there was still one painful memory I could not get over, which was the terrible memory of my father beating me up so badly. It hurt me so much. Why couldn’t my father love me, like other fathers love their children? I hope that one day I will have the opportunity to reconcile with my father, but the last time I checked, my family had already moved away and could not be located.

About 30% of prisoners are pledged guilty of substance abuse. Mental health problems can sometimes lead to alcohol or drug use, as some people with a mental health problem may misuse these substances as a form of self-medication. Mental health and substance use disorders share some underlying causes, including changes in brain composition, genetic vulnerabilities, and early exposure to stress or trauma. Children who experienced domestic violence are more prone to substance abuse. Once they are introduced to drugs it would be very hard to restore them back to health. Let us all pray for prisoners and drug addicts, that God may heal their addictions and rebuild their brokenness.

When I was in prison, you came to see me.’ – Matthew 25:36. Let us also pray for ourselves to be filled with the Holy Spirit and to bring the Gospel of Jesus Christ to the prisoners which they needed the most.